Dumpsville, USA
What to do on Monday instead of sitting at my computer all day:
Vacuum the house before I begin to believe we own a new pet instead of what is really our carpet.
Do something, anything, about the pile of mail on the dining room table and the crap on the stairs so the man who lives next door — and I know looks down into my house — thinks I actually am quite the tidy homemaker.
Clean my bathroom. Clean it — not just wipe it.
Close my closet doors so that I don’t have to see that I need to clean it also. Throwing socks away that I haven’t worn in five years could be a start.
Plant the flowers I bought on Saturday before the snails who are out in full force chew them down to the nubbins. Yes, this has happened before.
Pick up the piles of cuttings on the back patio that have been there over a week, cautiously avoiding any dog poop that the RT has hidden underneath, thinking I would never know. He knows I always know.
Avoid cleaning the office because I will not be able to resist sitting down for “just a minute” at this computer.
While avoiding the office, don protective gear and venture into the RT’s area to gather up laundry and collect cans, dishes, and junk food wrappers.
Use a different spot remover on the two new hairball stains left over the weekend by our yack-star, Precious.
Remove, er, I mean, chip off evidence of countless food explosions from the inside of the microwave.
Dress in real clothes and perhaps fix my hair.
Acknowledge that I’ll probably only get two or three of the items on this list done.
Is it Friday yet?
1earlene hofer
wrote on 26 March 2007 at 23:51
OMG! LOL to tears. Maybe it is so funny to me because I can picture you doing exactly how you describe. Also, it sounds like things I would and do do. Kelly, You are a wonderful, funny person who has always been able to laugh at youself.
2kellypea
wrote on 27 March 2007 at 0:16
I got a ‘holotta this list done today, but failed miserably in the part about not sitting at the computer. Glad I can slap a smile on your face.
3Ev Nucci
wrote on 29 March 2007 at 12:12
You had me hysterically laughing! Its so good to know there is someone else out there in the world who thinks like I do…….did you read my thinker? Its the one about My husband is from Venus and I’m from Mars……….you are so funny. My dad used to say, don’t crack a joke and laugh at yourself. I’m still laughing. And a to do as a guideline is hysterical! I have to promise myself not to go into the office and turn on my computer and start writing. I won’t get any work done. PROMISES TO MYSELF CONSTANTLY!
4kellypea
wrote on 29 March 2007 at 15:18
Thanks, Ev. I would have been a grease spot on the road a long time ago if I never laughed at myself. There’s so much to laugh at! I have to check out your thinker — I do remember the Venus/Mars thing and know we probably have that going on here, too. And there were TWO snails on those little plants when I finally put them in soil yesterday (three days after I said I would). They’re just a splat in the road now.