kellementology

I’ve been tagged. And what that means is that I have a challenge before me. It’s odd, really, because the challenge has forced me to think hard about something I’ve taken for granted for a very long time — having goals. And not just any goals, but the “top 5-10 goals that I gotta get so that I can truly say I have achieved my wildest dreams in life.” Those kinds of goals.

So why all this talk of goals, and what is being tagged all about? Well, Jen the Domestik Goddess — eloquent writer and blogger extraordinaire — included me in this opportunity to spill my guts on line according to the official rules set by Alex Shalman who started this meme.

I’ve always had goals; I’m that way by nature, but also chose a profession that is structured with, and supported by goals. I guess in thinking about this meme, realize they’ve changed because I’ve left that profession. Left that very demanding, crowded, and insanely busy world.

My world feels so small now: quiet, paced more slowly, and full of possibilities. So in thinking about the future, or what I’ve been calling the next 50 years, I have had to make some adjustments and have decided that it’s fair to include a couple of fairly huge goals I’ve begun work on recently.

My Top Goals to Achieve my Wildest Dreams in Life

1. Be Very Healthy
I can no longer avoid going to doctors to make sure everything is running smoothly. I will stick to my plan to lose 50 pounds, continue to improve my diet, and to exercise regularly so that I feel as good as I possibly can each day. This is difficult. If you’ve been reading about my Tuesday weigh-ins and the Phoodplan, you’ll get it. The real goal here underneath all the fluff is that I want to LIKE doing this.

2. Be Creative About My Life’s Passion

I have little pieces of paper around my house cut from horoscopes, copied from books, and saved from fortune cookies. They’re placed where I can see them, and think about them daily. The idea above stuck me because as far as work and employment are concerned, I’ve always been extremely practical. Get that job you can always count on an income with. Make sure it’s steady. Keep your nose to that grindstone. It’s a practical plan, but it will prevent you from ever growing any kind of creativity you have. It’s a difficult mindset to break. I see the piece of paper many times throughout the day and have promised myself that I will focus on creativity first, and practicality second — or even maybe tenth.

3. Be My Own Boss

I’ve had good relationships with those who have been classified as my superiors throughout my career. In fact, I have been the “boss” to as many as 100 people at a time in one place. So this isn’t about not being able to tolerate having someone tell me what to do or to be accountable to. It’s more about the second goal — I want to create my own income. Being my own boss would allow me to engage in work that is creative, that I enjoy, and that pays me an income that is pleasing, and benefits my family.

4. Build A House to Retire In

I love houses. I enjoy thinking about how they were planned, put together, and why certain things weren’t thought about differently. Looking at house plans is fun, too. Mentally walking through each blueprinted room, imagining how it might look when built is a time well spent as far as I’m concerned. I’d much rather do this than shop for clothes. So, I want the opportunity to plan and build the perfect house in the perfect place. Not too big — not too small. Room for family to come and stay when they want, or need. Space for friends and parties. A yard big enough to plant a vegetable garden. A house that I can say I designed and helped build. Painting counts, right? Maybe some sawing, too?

5. Write a Book About My Family and My Life

I know — who am I? So many others have, so why not? Why is their story more important than mine? I believe that if you knew what myself, and others in my family have overcome in order to live the lives we do, you’d say, “You should write that.” The problem is that some of it is difficult to think deeply about. It’s all tucked away and covered up unless I want to think about it. When I write about anything that isn’t glib, it’s emotionally demanding. But it’s been on my mind for over five years now, and now I don’t have an “I’m too busy” excuse to not write it.

6. Be Peaceful.

I’m a sort of “peel her off the ceiling once a day” kind of person. But I don’t have much going on anymore, so it’s easier to be calm. Yesterday, the Master of the House told me that the tax mines — although quite the bear this year — have been different, perhaps less stressful, because I am not at work. It’s probably the nicest thing he’s said to me. I’ve never considered myself to be a calming influence on anyone, but enjoy the notion. So I need to hang on to that. I’ll never be June Cleaver, but I can give this calm thing a shot. I’ll live longer, and so will those who care about me. They won’t have to worry about peeling me off the ceiling any more.

7. Waste Not, Want Not.

Well, the wanting part isn’t ever going to happen. I’ll just work differently to get what I want. I’m into the basic philosophy of “If you spend it, it will come.” Kind of like priming a pump. It works. But the waste part? This involves buying less food, preparing less food, throwing away less food. I’m working on that. It involves recycling, donating things in good condition that I don’t use, and actually using what I have instead of buying something new. This includes reading books that I currently have in my house before I buy new ones, or HELLO, going to the library. How many books is that? I counted. Fifty-six. I have 56 books I have either started and never finished, or purchased and never read sitting here. So…I have to read them. I’m on it. The sad thing is, there isn’t a smutty chic lit read amongst them. Sigh. Well, maybe one. This is going to be more difficult than liking exercising and eating well.

8. Share My Knowledge

I’ve accumulated a decent amount of knowledge — not opinions — over the past 20 years and it’s sort of just sitting there. Yes, knowledge changes over time, but the foundation doesn’t, and I have an exceptional foundation. I was fortunate to have been a part of many research projects, and enjoyed intense work influenced by a variety of perspectives over the course of my career in education. So this idea of sharing has to do with a kind of giving back. Teaching, or working at schools can be very isolating even though there are hundreds of people around you. And one of the biggest obstacles those currently working in education face, is thinking deeply about what works and what doesn’t work in their daily instruction so that kids are learning the best they possibly can — in spite of all they often bring to school. This has to be done with colleagues, not in isolation, and with a constructive attitude of “I’m willing to learn about improving practice.” Somehow, I still have something to give on this one. I’ll figure it out. But I’m giving myself until next January 1 to do that. Yellow school buses still spark a bit of anxiety at this point.

That’s my list. So what now in this tagging, meme thing? I get to tag a few people of my own. This was challenging, too, because if you’d ask me about this blogging business even two months ago, I would have said, huh? But as I learn, I’ve collected people who are mentors of sorts. Why these individuals?

1. They’ve been blogging longer than I have, about things that are of interest to me, and whom I know I can learn from.
2. I respect them. In fact, they’re somewhat daunting, but I persist in my lurking around their sites as much as I can because they’re so good at this and I have so much to learn.

• Mel from Freak Parade: amazing mom whose writing about life is emotionally sobering one minute and hilarious the next.

• Domestic Slackstress at 8 Centimeters Deluded has a cool blog, is involved in many causes, and whose writing exudes energy and is packed with edgy humor.

• At Culinary Concoctions by Peabody you will know that you have died and gone to foodie heaven. OMG. Her work will make your mouth drool all over your keyboard.

• And Jo at Life with Heathens has an amazing outlook on life in spite of huge challenges. Her blog is terrific and I feel like a slacker compared to her.

• Or Ev Nucci at My Live is Murphy’s Law whose philosophy about life, living, and liking yourself is refreshing. She tells it like it is with aplomb and panache.

• David at Wandering the Ether is a very deep thinker with a way with words. He’s on a quest to “read them all.” You know — those big works.

• Firefly at I Live on a Farm writes about a life that I would love…has 3 blogs, knits, and paints everyday. Wow. I love the way she writes.

• Lisa at La Mia Cucina is one of the originators of the Daring Bakers. It’s another drooler site and I’ve decided to join in their monthly baking challenges to see what they can teach me.

It’s a little strange to be tagging someone I don’t actually know, but my hope is that it will bring some more attention to their sites, and provide those who read them as much pleasure as they have provided me. So in that spirit, I’m passing on to you (whom I’ve tagged above), the same interesting experience I’ve just completed. I’m looking forward to what you will write… Don’t forget here are the rules…