kellementology

life according to me

Tag: Narcissism

  • Skip Bil-ary: I’m the man for the job.

    It’s official. I’ve decided I have the qualifications to become a candidate for President of the U.S.A.

    What do you think?


    You Are 5: The Investigator


    You’re independent – and a logical analytical thinker.
    You love learning and ideas… and know things no one else does.Bored by small talk, you refuse to participate in boring conversations.
    You are open minded. A visionary. You understand the world and may change it.At Your Best: You are sharp, inventive, and creative. You have the skills to lead the world.
    At Your Worst: You are reclusive, weird, and a bit paranoid.

    Your Fixation: Greed

    Your Primary Fear: Being useless or incompetent

    Your Primary Desire: Being competent and needed

    Other Number 5’s: Bill Gates, John Lennon, Kurt Cobain, Bjork, and Stephen Hawking.

    What Number Are You?

    “Know things that no one else does…” Can you even imagine the number of things DubYah knows that we will never, ever know?  Scary.

    “Refuse to participate in boring conversations…”  Like at press conferences with the media persistently ask why…or how… or when…and DubYah grins and blithely states that he said he wasn’t going to answer those questions.  Because he’s just not gonna do it.  He doesn’t have to.

    “Have the skills to lead the world…”  Think about it — his daddy set things up ahead of time.  And then he just hired all of his daddy’s people.  And he made sure no one ever actually saw Cheney.  Ever.  And setting up the whole hanging chad thing was a good touch just to make sure.

    “Being useless or incompetent…”  Who was it that said that the only thing we have to fear is fear itself?  Churchill?  Actually, it was Eleanor Roosevelt.  Okay, so be afraid.  Be very afraid.  Wait.  I already am. (See below)

    “Reclusive, weird, and a bit paranoid…”

  • My Soundtrack of What Matters. And Yours?

    Oh look everyone.  Another Saturday.  I continue to be amazed that the days on the calendar just whip by with such complete disregard for the fact that I’m on the back side of a half century and it’d be nice if things could slow down a bit.  Not permanently, of course.  But long enough to allow for the extended time I require to think about things that really don’t matter in the grander scheme of the universe and the survival of the species.  I don’t know which particular species, but still.

    But there are some things that matter so much, I can’t imagine what I’d do without them.  The loss so many have experienced this past week in San Diego in the wildfires has prompted me to wonder about choosing if I had to.  But my choices aren’t necessitated by a fire.  They’re the result of simply taking stock, and acknowledging what keeps me anchored.  Understood is that family and friends are not something to be considered here.  Period.

    Solitude.  I can be around many, many people.  But I prefer not to.  I love the busy roar of a large city, but not as much as a winding road and low grass covered hills.  And music?  It can bring me to tears, cause me to dance, or force me to sing along whether there are words or not.  But even music can’t compete with my need for solitude.  The quiet I enjoy for part of every day when the only sound I can hear is the rustle of trees outside my window, or the creak of wood somewhere in the house matters.  Plain, simple quiet.

    My stove.  I could say cooking, but not being one of those Top Chef type people, I wouldn’t want to have to cook on a hot plate, or a sterno flame.  No.  I’d need my stove.  The one with the nine cheery red knobs.  I’ve heard people say they love their cars — the purr of the engine, the handling, the acceleration.  That’s how I feel about my stove.  Ah…the sound it makes when those convection fans switch on.  Vroom…vroom….It isn’t in my kitchen because its design is sleek, although it is.  Or because its technology is a wonder.  But it is pretty amazing. It’s in my kitchen because I use it.  Seriously use it and have fun the entire time.  It connects me to food and family and friends.  Creativity and learning.  Tradition and new cuisine.  It provides the peace of mind that diligently proceeding through a set of steps can provide, and at the end of them all, have my taste buds sing.  Could I have all of this without my particular stove?  Certainly.  But it just wouldn’t be the same.  It weighs a bit more than my Mac at about 1,000 lbs. so it isn’t exactly something I can ever take with me if I go.  But I’d find a way to get another.  Trust me.

    My Mac.  It has one little plug that connects it to my house.  One.  But it connects me to so much more than I can possibly be connected to otherwise.  Ironically, I’m writing this on the MoH’s laptop, and it’s fine, but it’s not my Mac.  I could make due with a different computer if I didn’t have a Mac.  I can buy just about anything I want, read (which would be another thing I wouldn’t do without because it’s like breathing), travel, learn, listen, create…But it wouldn’t be the same.  Iwouldn’t have my lovely screen, or sleek white lines, or easily swiveleing-thingy-ness.  I wouldn’t be able to waste copious amounts of time with iPhoto, or click open my Finder services for the Oxford dictionary (the Webster widget doesn’t come close…).  And photobooth, and iChat (which I’ve just learned to use).  Pathetic, isn’t it?  Don’t even argue with me about this.  I’m a goner.  And iTunes?  Well.

    Rod wants to know what’s on my playlist.  I don’t have an iPod (solitude, remember?) but I do happen to have three whole playlists on in my iTunes library which are organized very specifically.  And when I check the list of songs I’ve played most, the following come up.  They’re supposed to say much about who and what I am, or what I’ve been thinking.  But I’ve developed an odd habit at this point in my life.  I don’t listen to the words of songs.  I listen for the melody.  I listen to whether it’s written in a major or minor key, whether it’s sung by an uncomplicated voice and a single instrument, or an energetic voice and a band.  And it’s all connected to mood.  I listen when I have to write.  When I have to sit at the computer and am easily distracted.  I play it loudly, singing along — whether there are words or not.  So I’m not sure what these particular songs say about me.  I’ll have to think about it.  But I’ll have to figure out what the words are first.

    She Is     The Fray     (40)

    Snow     Red Hot Chili Peppers (37)

    Betty     Kate Walsh  (26)

    Savin’ Me     Nickelback (25)

    If it Makes You Happy  Sheryl Crow  (25)

    In Need  Sheryl Crow  (24)

    What About Now  Daughtry  (23)

    When the Lights go Down  Faith Hill  (23)

    Photograph  Nickelback  (23)

    Over You  Daughtry  (22)

    Squeeze Me  Diana Krall  (22)

    You’re Still Here  Faith Hill  (22)

    Slow Like Honey  Fiona Apple  (22)

    Tonight  Kate Walsh  (22)

    Nearness of You  Norah Jones  (22)

    This post was sponsored by Robert of Miscellaneous Ramblings who inquired about “Three Things I Wouldn’t Let Go,” and Rod of Inside Rod’s Head who insisted that “Our Players Don’t Lie.”  The links provide the directions which are blissfully uncomplicated.  Yes!  There is a meme god in the sky.

    What do you think chick, vanessa, paisley, meleah, mel, jenny, phil, rj, scott, and micki (whom I know has a “meme-free” zone, but am asking the question anyway)?  It’s an interesting exercise combining the two…I’ll have to do some analysis on it after I figure out the words of the songs I’ve listed.

    Have a splendiferous weekend.

  • Minx interview reveals no pink ruffles for Kellypea

    I love Thursday. It’s always been my favorite day of the week. The whole idea of a weekend and its promise stretching out before me has has always confirmed that looking forward to something is one of the finest pleasures in life. Mind you, nothing spectacular has to be planned that causes this feeling of anticipation. It’s simply the possibility. The opportunity. The choices that can be made. I love to wallow through them one by simple one. They’re rarely something that would catch another’s attention, and you’d most likely laugh if I took the time now to say what they are, but I’ll save that for another time. Don’t hold your breath, though.

    So to celebrate Thursday, and that I most diligently worked for the better part of the day yesterday, today, I’m here. First thing. Completely and utterly committed to responding to five questions put forth to yours truly by The Domestic Minx, that clever, purring, femme fatale of Bloggsville who has quite the alluring way with words, and proclivity for risque art.

    I vaguely remember volunteering for this interview some time ago, fascinated and curious about what she might want to know — clever Minx that she is…

    1. Like you, Kellypea, I love to get lost in a good book. Your blog is like that; fascinating, funny and filled with your incorrigible wit! If the whole shebang was to be made into a book, what would the teaser be? Tell me the blurb!!

    Hmmm…get out your Wellies for this one, folks:

    We’ve often been told that the sum of the parts are greater than the whole. That would not be the case with a small, but colorful place of Bloggsville that has an exceptionally large presence, leaving the reader with a sense of, “What the hell was that all about?” three whole minutes after they’ve left kellementology. Kellypea, the author of kellementology draws in the unsuspecting surfer in Bloggsville with a Warholesque visage of a female in the header that one may be not quite prepared for. But she claims to know something about “grasping life by the short hairs,” so perhaps a brief visit may uncover tips which can be capitalized upon.

    Perusing entries of Kellypea’s weblog such as “Lub Notes and Swollen Body Parts,” and “Math and Sunshine in Dark Places,” may give readers the idea that she is just another woman with great feet and a relentlessly persistent pretense of wanting a body like Kate Moss. But then you stumble upon pieces like “Complexity + Change = Simplicity,” and “Teenagers and Circus Hoops” and you begin to understand that she’s a bit more complex than you may have thought — even if you are really only searching for “ricky lake + diet + book.”

    Kellypea is kellementology, and without her convoluted nature and shameless self indulgence, this blog would certainly be just another blip on the Technorati link train.

    Now if it was all to become a film, of course that’s another matter entirely…

     

    Movie Poster

    2. I know how challenging it can be living in a house full of men, darling. How and when do you use your femininity to your advantage?

    Okay, so what would “feminity” be, exactly? I have conflicting images creating havoc in my mind of Marilyn Monroe singing “I Want to be Loved by You” in Some Like it Hot,

    Marilyn Monroe in Some Like it Hot

    June Cleaver in a negligee, and Phyllis Diller greeting her husband at the door after work wrapped in Saran Wrap.

    I’m wondering if it means crying when I don’t get my way, or laying in bed all day with a head ache and expecting room service.

    I’m more comfortable just being me. No ruffles, no pink things, no girly stuff. In fact, I really don’t get the whole “girly girl” thing. It actually makes me uncomfortable. And using it to an advantage? You’re kidding, right?

    When I’m fed up with something, I get mad, I don’t cry.

    When I want something, I get it myself. I don’t hint around about it. I take care of it. Well, most of the time.

    The whole pampering thing escapes me. I don’t like people doing things for me. It makes me grossly uncomfortable. I’m sure there’s some kind of bizarre psychological explanation for that one somewhere out there, and goodness, chime right in with your comments.

    Nope. No feminine wiles. I am what I am.

    3. Although your recent sojourn by Lake Tahoe must seem an age away, I was horridly jealous reading about it. Describe in infuriating detail your perfect holiday escape.

    Warm, crystal clear water the color of a softly worn piece of sea glass. Sand so white, it can’t be real. A sky dotted with clouds here and there, floating slowly through a balmy breeze. A hooded lounge chair perfectly positioned on a deck just outside a beach house with an unobstructed view of the ocean, not 50 yards away. Palm fronds rustling against one another high above, casting occasional shadows across my legs. An excellent book about nothing that matters. The possibility of an afternoon sail. A fabulous dinner of fresh, fresh food and someone to cook it perfectly. The MoH snoring softly next to me…

    And a guy in khaki shorts and a white linen shirt who never lets my glass empty of Yellow Birds.

    Atlantis was spectacular…and about as close as I have gotten to what I’ve described here.
    But a small beach house with no one else around? Now that would be truly heaven on Earth.

    Yes, that would just about do it.

    4. Promises of “Extra Sizing your man unit with Extra Size Plus” may not have your heart pounding, but do tell, what would be the very best thing that could be delivered to your Inbox?

    Ahhh…the patience I have for SPAM. With absolutely no hesitation, I would swoon for legitimate and free monthly surprise packages from places like Dean & Deluca, The French Gourmet Store, Tabula Tua, Bittersweet Pastries, and A Cook’s Wares. And an opportunity to try them out, sample their wonderfulness, and then write about them. For pay, of course. I know it’s not as exciting to some as perhaps getting free shoes such as this in the mail,

     

    but it would be wasted on me. Really. But red shoes? Now that’s a completely different issue all together. So call me Dorothy? Uh, minus Kansas.

    5. Being a busy wife and mother means there never seems to be enough time to orchestrate the pampering one needs on a regular basis…What are the delicious treats you can’t do without, Kellypea, what are the indulgences you wish you had more time for and what things get left by the wayside?

    Busy? Uh, no. For the very first time in my life, I’m not busy at all, so I can’t put myself alongside all those who are working, or raising children — or both. Oh, and going to school as well. Yes, I’ve done those things and although it was exhausting, it was worth it. Should I be busy? Well I’d have to define “busy.”

    If you’ve read even one or two of my posts, you know by now that I might be considered one of the fortunate few. I don’t go to a “job” or necessarily work for someone else. At least right now, I don’t. That could change. It has been quite the luxury and I could stop there and consider it the ultimate extended pampering session. But a funny thing happened along this path to taking time off to consider myself in this life. I did what I normally do. I learn something and end up occupying my time with everything but what I thought I would have. It figures. So I’m never bored, but most likely am not indulging myself in the pampering sessions others might prefer.

    The ultimate indulgence would be to have someone come to my home, take a look around, finish all the projects I’ve left undone, fix what my eye hasn’t quite seen the right way, clean and scrub and buff to a sparkling state, and organize what needs to be organized. Closets, garage (which really isn’t so bad if you can believe that), drawers, and cupboards…family photos…all of it. And I’d love to join in on the effort, of course, because I’d find it interesting. Plus, I’d get to make those labels I’ve spoken of. I’d LOVE those labels. Now, I could probably devote a week to the effort by myself and not have the Magic Martha show up at my front door, but I’d be distracted and never finish. That’s why I’d salivate over this indulgence. Everything would be organized, lined up, fluffed up. No fleas, no hairballs, no stinky teenage bathroom. Just clean, sleek surfaces and fresh, lightly scented air…

    Okay. You get the idea.

    Not exactly burning up the pages, here, am I? Predictable? Most likely not. Screaming out about a cause? Hmmm…I’m more private about those kinds of things for some reason. But I enjoy blathering on about whatever strikes my fancy, and responding to questions from Minx has certainly helped to make my Thursday the best day I’ve had this week.

    And I haven’t been distracted the entire time I’ve been writing.

    Fancy that.

    I know. Shut up and go back to work.